a father differentiate between his child because his painful past

child
I am a hitched man with 3 kids. I originate from a group of 3 child,i being the second conceived. Now,when I was developing I seen my folks didn’t care for or adore me like my other siblings. They used to purchase beneficial things for them alone. I used to be beaten like a puppy found in the mosque. I grew up knowing this,but express gratitude toward God they gave me training and I am doing great throughout everyday life. Presently this is my story. I got hitched to an exceptionally delightful woman and we were honored with an extremely attractive boy. I adored and still do love him. After 4 years we were honored with an exceptionally wonderful infant young lady. Presently here is when things turned. Ididn’t care for my little girl at all,she was colic and used to cry alot. My loathe grew,i used to squeeze her everything the time when am with her and tell my wife(haka kamtu kanapenda kulia sana ovyo).

He behaved painful on his child like his parents

I did this for some time however I began feeling so regretful and choose just to accept her. I began getting back home late and leaving early just to maintain a strategic distance from her. child But we I am around on ends of the week or occasions I would play with my child and evade her. My better half began seeing my practices yet I truly endeavored to deny when she inquires. We got our third conceived daughter. Am disclosing to you I cherished her with all my heart. She is nearly my most loved child if not top pick. To make the story short. I love my first and last brought into the world such a great amount a la mode. Yet I don’t indicate in light of the fact that they are altogether adults now. This is my assumption,i think my folks contaminated me. They used to despise me as their second conceived. Now here I am doing likewise to my own fragile living creature and blood. I end up crying and asking God for what good reason this. In any case, now is past the point of no return since I think she is seeing since. She once inquire as to whether I cherished her however lied and said yes yet somewhere inside my heart I realized I was lying. Benevolent I require some counsel and still want to be consistent.

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