Am kind of not in to opening up relationship and I prefer my own company most times, yes I do have friends but I edited the list like the start of these year and now I can count about ten and I have completely shut out the rest. All they say is that “am being proud” and am like its OK.
I have a lot going on relationship with my family but that is for another day. Today am going to talk about my current relationship.
i Am a university student and I really don’t feel like am doing what I want but its ok since everyone is pushing me, and it’s worse since am the last born in a family of five and I feel like they expect too much. The pressure is killing me.
Ok it was about relationship. I am dating a married man and am aware of the fact that he’s married and has got a kid. Yes I know what some people are thinking “if you know he’s married why don’t you leave him…” and some are persecuting me now… But before you judge me know that *I LOVE*these man.
I have tried hard to leave him but it just doesn’t work. If any of you have ever fallen in love then you know what I mean. In the morning you stare at the phone waiting for even a text, you don’t wanna call him because you don’t wanna look desperate.
It’s hard, it’s heart breaking, it hurts. hearing he is with his wife I always cry whether from the guilt or jealousy I don’t even know.
Remember these before I was the kind of person who believed you should not get involved with a married man, because he’s got kids(and imagining how thy would feel), he’s got a wife(how she’ll feel).
Some may think these happened to me -yes but mine is a complicated family,:what ever my parents did it didnt concern us, even if I walked into a bar and found my dad partying with some girl I would leave them to their thing though he passed away.
But why I believed so is, back in high school there are these girls who would talk to you about how they suffer(emotionally) and would like their divorced parents to get back together or how their mum is these because of their dad.
I used to think they are over reacting since to me your parents esues were their own. But these letter changed as I got engaged with different students and by the time I was finishing highschool I couldn’t even date a player let alone a married man.
Back to my relationship story
You may ask your self why I even love a married man, these man gave me hope I was at that point in my life I didn’t know where I was going these guy showed me that the world has more colours than just the shades of black and white.
He showed me even if its not fine or far from perfect I should face it cause he told me those problems you can either solve them or live through them until they’re over or you are over.
He also taught me that I could believe in a person. And for the fast time I opened up to ssomeone. And he’s given me a lot than that that if I start writing I’ll never finish.
Before meeting him I had slept with seven different guys. And with him our fast time was magical and I don’t think I want anything more.
To me he’s a LOVER a LIFE COACH and a LISTENER. He might not be what I dreamed of but he is everything I want.
And I tell him every time that I love him.
you can also read these “I met up with this Lady at a club when my old friend” & “What is love ?“